Movies

Feel Bad for Karen Gillan And Her Short Shorts In The First Image from the New ‘Jumanji’

Poor girl is going to be eaten alive (quite literally) out there.

We’ve known about the existence of the Jumanji reboot for a long time now, but that’s pretty much all we’ve know about it — it’s a movie project, will probably feature a board game coming to life in some way, and include cast members Dwayne Johnson, Kevin Hart, Jack Black, and Karen Gillan. Everything else about the film? Kind of up in the air at this point.

But the Jake Kasdan (Sex Tape) led film has officially begun principal photography in Hawaii (the most jungley of places in the US), and cast loudmouth/consummate promoter Kevin Hart has already posted a picture of himself and his co-star on his Instagram page. Check it out below.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BKkDFYGh28x/?taken-by=kevinhart4real

Now of course there’s a lot to digest here (including Jack Black in 1800’s Treasure Hunting Uncle cosplay), but the most substantial (least substantial?) thing of note has to be Karen Gillan’s costume. Now of course she looks GREAT in it (when doesn’t she?), but boy does it look wildly impractical for the kind of jungle safari the other three men seem to be going on. I can only hope that the hilariously large backpack that Kevin Hart is lugging is filled with multiple cans of “Off!” She’s certainly going to need it in order to combat against the mosquitoes and other creatures going after her legs and/or midriff.

Now look, I get it — they are all clearly trying to replicate different explorer types with the ensemble, from Johnson’s Indiana Jones-esque garb to Black’s “Jane’s Dad from Disney’s Tarzen” get up. And I guess the token female is simply stuck with the token Lara Croft outfit, pretty much by default. Still though, even Croft adopted a more practical, less revealing outfit over time. And when your movie character’s costume is more sexist and silly then its video game counterpart, you know you have a problem.

At the very least, they should have given The Rock an equally tiny set of shorts — that would have at least given the (supposedly?) comedic project a level of self-awareness that would lend itself to the humor, ala 21 Jump Street. And let’s be honest here: no one would complain about The Rock in tiny shorts. NO ONE.

Jumanji is set to arrive in theaters on July 28, 2017. Between it and May’s Baywatch, Summer 2017 is going to have a lot of reason to swoon over The Rock. More so than usual, at least.

-Matthew

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