Ewoks suck. Yes, I’m sorry 80’s kids, with your He-Man action figures, Pee Wee’s Playhouse, and spotty yet vivid memories of the Challenger explosion — Ewoks just really, really suck. They were the Jar Jar Binks of 1983, and you all were just too young to realize it at the time. But it’s okay — us young uns’ are here to teach you the errors of your ways, including but not limited to your love of a bunch of stupid looking bear creatures that stopped a trilogy closer dead in its tracks.
Now Porgs, on the other hand? Totally different things. They are cute, and adorable, and wonderful, and will make Star Wars: The Last Jedi the best Star Wars film ever crafted.
So watch the brand new, official video debut of the Porgs, featured in something called the “Star Wars: The Last Jedi trailer.” Whatever that means. Obviously the Porg appearance was the clear standout of the new Star Wars: The Last Jedi footage, but there’s plenty of other cool things nestled within this trailer. Not necessarily “porg” cool but, hey, is anything?
And for those who are particularly averse to spoilers in the trailer, I think this one is pretty safe. Like the first teaser trailer (and pretty much everything from The Force Awakens), there’s not a lot of actual story details in this Last Jedi trailer. We just see a lot of Rey and Luke training together (which we all assumed would happen from the way the last film concluded), and Kylo Ren doing some pretty mischievous things (like potentially murdering his mother, apparently in an attempt to get Parricide Bingo.)
Also, this:
OH MY GOD, IT THINKS ITS WOOKIE. IT THINKS ITS WOOKIE, YOU GUYS!!!!
The most revealing moment of the trailer might be the end, in which Rey is seemingly telling Kylo that “I need someone to show me my place in all this.” That is, we assume Rey is speaking to Kylo. As is always important to remember with these trailers, it’s all just fancy editing, and though Kylo and Rey are certainly in the same location in these shots, that doesn’t mean they are actually sharing the scene together.
Furthermore, the line of dialogue is not actually spoken by Rey in the scene — it’s a voiceover, which can clearly be taken out of context from ANY moment of the film. It’s an enticing moment for sure, but also one that seems specifically made to leave audiences saying “WHAAAAAT???”…even if it’s completely manufactured by the trailer itself. After all, this the same company that gave us this shot at the end of the first Rogue One trailer:
Don’t trust ending shots, is all I’m saying.
But potential trickery aside, this is still a pretty rad trailer, with a bunch of great moments within it. The film itself looks pretty stunning just visually, and combined with the music, it really makes an impact. As someone who loved and still loves The Force Awakens, I’ve been eagerly anticipating this sequel since December 2015. This trailer doesn’t make the next two months any easier to wait through, but at least its something to whet the appetite, no? And when said whetting included this, it’s hard to complain.
Yes, I know I’ve already included this gif in the article. But what you may not understand is this: it’s a Porg. And this little penguin hamster motherfucker deserves ALL the gif placement in the damn world.